Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 4400 of 5593

   messageicon I make good girls go back to the ex they still have feelings for.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 15:45 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every girl has a slutty friend.....and if you people were any kind of friend at all, you would introduce me to yours
←Rate | 10-10-2011 15:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The severity of an itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 15:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon blackberry crashes around the world ministerially!!! well 4 days in heaven and already working on the competition, good job steve :)
←Rate | 10-10-2011 14:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I feel like a Tampon today...In a good place at the wrong time.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 14:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon great.... Oprah is interviewing Rosie O'Donnell tonight on OWN. tune in if you ever wondered what a Double Stuffed Oreo sounds like
←Rate | 10-10-2011 14:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have decided that I am going to win the Nobel Peace Prize, and I don't care who I have to kill to do it.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 14:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon celebrating columbus day with a home invasion.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 14:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate when I walk through a metal detector and my abs of steel set them off.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 13:51 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm collecting every toy that the neighbors kid throws in my yard, I already have tons of Christmas presents for my nieces and nephews this year!
←Rate | 10-10-2011 13:47 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon You're the joke, I merely provide the punch line..
←Rate | 10-10-2011 13:35 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Water does not collect on TOP of a hill, take the damn bucket up there yourself! Stupid Blonde!!! ~ what Jack should have said to Jill
←Rate | 10-10-2011 13:34 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've really got to quit telling people about my wedding. The guest list is out of control & the Bride may not even have been born yet!
←Rate | 10-10-2011 13:14 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon i totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger
←Rate | 10-10-2011 13:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think it is hilarious that the Wall St. protestors hate big corporations, carring signs made with posterboard and markers they bought at WALMART, while wearing their GAP jeans, taking pictures with their MOTOROLA or AT&T camera phones, and drinking from
←Rate | 10-10-2011 12:09 by Timber Comments (0)  


   messageicon has been celebrating Columbus Day by walking into my neighbors homes and telling them that I live there now.........
←Rate | 10-10-2011 11:46 by sully Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can tell my girlfriend's Japanese because her genitals produce a forcefield that pixelates the air around them.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 11:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I patiently wait, after posting a humorous status message on facebook, for the first "Debbie Downer" to come along who completely doesn't get it, then posts a comment which totally destroys the joke
←Rate | 10-10-2011 11:27 by MTQ Comments (0)  


   messageicon well at least Quikflix lived up to its name.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 11:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girl and I are like oil and vinegar. Not meant to go together. But shake us up and, hell I dunno, put us on your salad.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 11:10 by Pazza Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left