Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Funny Status Messages
|
Recent Comments
|
Submit a Status Message
Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
View All Funny Status Messages
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Trump Filter:
ON
|
OFF
Search Messages:
«Prev
«1
4390
4391
4392
4393
4394
4395
4396
4397
5577
Next»
Page: 4394 of 5577
Dear haters: "Thank you for reminding me that I'm everything that you can never be"
10
5
←Rate |
09-27-2011 12:09
Comments (
0
)
When I breakup with someone, I breakup with their photos, their phone numbers and their memories.
19
9
←Rate |
09-27-2011 12:04
Comments (
0
)
Where did you learn how to whisper? In a damn helicopter? Geeez
22
10
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:48 by
b u b entertaining
Comments (
0
)
A slut does anything for any man, a freak does anything for her man, and a lady does anything for one man.
13
11
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:46
Comments (
0
)
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
16
8
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:36 by
ELF
Comments (
0
)
Usually, the easiest thing to do is say you are sorry. But there are times when you realise that in the face of what you have done, saying sorry is just so ridiculous.
8
7
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:26
Comments (
0
)
Don't waste your time worrying about a piece of sh*t that's not worried about you.
8
12
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:23 by
NO BODY
Comments (
0
)
I got some mail yesterday that says, "Tiime-Sensitive Material Enclosed." So I guess I gotta keep it away from clocks...
9
10
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:22 by
Mike M
Comments (
0
)
Somewhere in the world, some stripper is still claiming she is paying her way through college ten years and no degree later.
44
13
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:11 by
NO BODY
Comments (
0
)
No! but that's a really nice ski mask!
12
6
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:10 by
jigga
Comments (
0
)
If the fate of humanity ever rests on me filling out an online customer survey, we're pretty much doomed.
26
6
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:09 by
SuthernFukr
Comments (
0
)
I pledged allegiance "to the republic for witches stand" until third grade.
20
8
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:09 by
SuthernFukr
Comments (
0
)
Dear dude holding his wifes purse in the middle of the food court. Have some dignity and at least strike the Heisman pose.
26
6
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:08 by
SuthernFukr
Comments (
0
)
Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly.
4
5
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:05 by
SuthernFukr
Comments (
0
)
When I say “Nevermind.” I really mean you should've listened the first time.
24
5
←Rate |
09-27-2011 11:04 by
SuthernFukr
Comments (
0
)
[Status update only available to Facebook® Gold™ account holders]
107
19
←Rate |
09-27-2011 10:29 by
JaxWylde
Comments (
0
)
I hate when people see me at a grocery store and say, "Hey! What are you doing here?"... I'm like "oh you know, just hunting elephants and stuff..."
6
2
←Rate |
09-27-2011 10:07
Comments (
0
)
The most awkward thing you can hear from the guy at the urinal next to you..."Hey, nice watch".
60
13
←Rate |
09-27-2011 09:53 by
TheChuckster
Comments (
0
)
No! But id ok if she break up wif you if you talk like dis
79
17
←Rate |
09-27-2011 09:51
Comments (
0
)
it ok 2 break up wid a girl if she forcibly makes you watch one of dose stupid twilight movies???
6
29
←Rate |
09-27-2011 09:38 by
ericroflmao
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
4390
4391
4392
4393
4394
4395
4396
4397
5577
Next»
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com