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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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Life is like a can of whipped cream.....you have to shake things up a little before you get anything out of it.
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10-14-2011 20:59 by
BEGO
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When I was a child,I acted like a child and had imaginary friends,now they just call it facebook.
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10-14-2011 20:58 by
BEGO
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There is 2 types of ugly girls; the UGLY girls, and the girls with MAKE-UP.
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10-14-2011 20:57 by
BEGO
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With all the people on my back, it's a miracle I can even walk.
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10-14-2011 20:56 by
BEGO
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Life is sexually transmitted.
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10-14-2011 20:30
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Michael Vick is gonna DAWG the Redskins.
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10-14-2011 20:26
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What College did your "Smart phone" go to?
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10-14-2011 20:17
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I'm at that stage where I have the wardrobe of a skateboarder and the hairline of someone who yells at skateboarders.
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10-14-2011 20:00 by
flinnie
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Girls just want to have funds.
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10-14-2011 19:50 by
g0re
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Moving to Google+ after a facebook change is like moving to Canada after an election. Noone actually goes through with it, and even if you did, you wouldn't have any friends when you get there.
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10-14-2011 19:41 by
g0re
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Admit it, your heart skips a beat when you see the 'number' on the globe icon whenever you login to FB ;o)
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10-14-2011 19:38 by
spook
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Checking In' on Facebook Places is really just another way of people showing other people how much better their day is/was than yours.
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10-14-2011 19:35 by
g0re
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This Crest 3d whitening toothpaste didn't come with the glasses.
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10-14-2011 18:59
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It takes 2 to tangle- Headphones!
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10-14-2011 18:56
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When George Washington got carded he just pulled out a quarter.
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10-14-2011 18:38
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Did ya ever want to throw a breath mint in someone's mouth while they were talking?
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10-14-2011 18:22
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Fridge full of food= nothing to eat. Drawer full of clothes= nothing to wear. Internet full of sites=only on Facebook.
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10-14-2011 18:21
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Whoever decided this Halloween candy is the "fun" size is not someone I care to party with.
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10-14-2011 18:12 by
Rick H.
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That akward moment when a Zombie is looking for brains and it walks right past you..
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10-14-2011 18:01 by
Aaron
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misery is God's way of letting you know your on track!
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10-14-2011 18:00
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