Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary section
←Rate | 10-28-2011 05:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes you have to look back to see just how far you HAVE come. Dont dwell on the past. Things and people move into the past for a reason and do not make it into your present and future for a reason. You look back to gain perspective, not to gain doubt
←Rate | 10-28-2011 04:40 by DOUG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Saw a baby wearing a bib which read "This dumb ass put my cape on backwards"
←Rate | 10-28-2011 04:22 by SAn Comments (0)  


   messageicon Judge: "Wen did you realised you hv been raped?" Prostitute: "When the cheque bounced"
←Rate | 10-28-2011 03:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon going to murder the most awesomest person alive, but that would be suicide
←Rate | 10-28-2011 01:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Changing a whole text because you didn't know how to spell one word.
←Rate | 10-28-2011 01:24 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm about to yell inside an envelope!....voice mail..b*tch
←Rate | 10-28-2011 01:13 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whoever said “nothing is impossible” has obviously never seen me doing nothing.
←Rate | 10-28-2011 01:11 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Taking a test at school: My answer is Yes. If yes please explain...my answer is No
←Rate | 10-28-2011 01:07 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate it when someone else buys the things I mentally claimed
←Rate | 10-28-2011 01:06 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know what's more awkward, Answering Dora, Or sitting there in total silence while she stares at you..
←Rate | 10-28-2011 01:02 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon everybody is always the same thing for Halloween...drunk as sh*t
←Rate | 10-28-2011 01:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I wave at you, you better wave back and not make me look stupid!
←Rate | 10-28-2011 00:49 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Halloween isn't really that different than any other day.. everyone's still pretending to be someone or something their not.
←Rate | 10-28-2011 00:42 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon i like to scare girls a bit by telling them"We are going to meet my parents" on the first date.
←Rate | 10-28-2011 00:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Studying: The act of texting, eating, and watching TV with an open textbook nearby
←Rate | 10-28-2011 00:25 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Childbirth is nothing compared to walking through tall grass with sh!tty a$$ Pokémon.
←Rate | 10-28-2011 00:23 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guess I better watch the end of this little baseball game so I can say tomorrow ' yeah I saw that,didn't think (___insert winner here___) would pull it off ! The lengths I go just to fit in. ;-)
←Rate | 10-28-2011 00:18 by KyRebel129 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What does frozen beer, burnt pizza and a pregnant girl all have in common? A dumba$$ who forgot to take it out in time.
←Rate | 10-28-2011 00:08 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I don't make at least one person scream, "WTF" then my day is not done yet.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 23:55 Comments (0)  



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