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We all suffer from a stroke at some point in our lives. Whether it be a stroke of bad luck, a blood clot, or a dry handjob.
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11-07-2011 13:58 by
KISSTOPHER
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Some moments you remember all your life. Reading this, unfortunately, is not one of those moments.
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11-07-2011 13:56 by
SEAN
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Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand. Sex is best learned by doing.
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11-07-2011 13:56
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With only one plug in this hospital room it's not looking good for Nana's respirator if my phone battery dies and I have another AWESOME face book status update .
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11-07-2011 13:55 by
SEAN
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The less power a man has, the more he likes to use it. That's why bouncers are d!cks.
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11-07-2011 13:52 by
KISSTOPHER
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In life everything has a Yin & a Yang. Without demoralizing Monday mornings, there would be no debaucherous Friday nights.
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11-07-2011 13:50
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Don't feel bad Westerners, somewhere there is a Chinese kid in an American restaurant struggling with a knife & fork.
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11-07-2011 13:47 by
KISSTOPHER
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You can learn a lot about a woman from the top dresser drawer beside her bed....
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11-07-2011 12:43 by
bryan j brown
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Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday. ( MONDAY )
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11-07-2011 12:19
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No one is lazier than the people who name convenience stores.
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11-07-2011 12:05
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I'm in shape: Unfortunately it's the wrong one.
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11-07-2011 11:49
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I like my beaver how I like my chicken...free range.
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11-07-2011 10:40
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If you can text with both hands at the same time, you are Ambi-Textual.
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11-07-2011 09:52 by
sean
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If you listen to the new Coldplay album on very good speakers you can actually hear the band growing ovaries.
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11-07-2011 09:51 by
SuthernFukr
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I'm about to get in the middle of some girl-on-girl action with Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Butterworth.
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11-07-2011 09:22 by
SuthernFukr
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HEADLINE: Justin Bieber wins big, trashes rumours at EMAs. You go girrrrrrrrrrrrrl....
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11-07-2011 09:05
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you know its time to get a girlfriend when you start looking for socks behind the dryer..
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11-07-2011 08:30
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Don't tease fat girls, elephants never forget...
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11-07-2011 08:00 by
Lu
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We're probably accidentally giving ghosts handjobs all the time
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11-07-2011 07:54 by
Lu
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So many women.... So little time to disappoint them all...
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11-07-2011 07:51 by
Lu
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