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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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quietly ovulating.
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10-27-2011 08:55
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Every time a cat dies, somewhere out there "Curiosity" is high-fiving his buddies.
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10-27-2011 08:54 by
flinnie
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I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.
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10-27-2011 08:53
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You say I'm afraid of commitment, but maybe it's you that's afraid of total uncertainty.
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10-27-2011 08:50 by
NJS
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4 out of 5 midgets,,, make 2 people.
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10-27-2011 08:03
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I went to the paint store to get thinner... but I haven't lost any weight yet
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10-27-2011 07:50 by
NoVowel
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Don't judge a kindle download by it's jpeg cover page
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10-27-2011 07:42
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There are some people on Facebook who don't understand the difference between 'Whats on your mind?' And ‘I should probably see a therapist about this'
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10-27-2011 07:30
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I just heard that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie went and adopted Justin and Selena....
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10-27-2011 06:22 by
Shawn Rutter
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Wishing everyone Happy Diwali (Festival of Lights) :)
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10-27-2011 05:06
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A pastor was caught by a fellow church member breaking into a church safe. The pastor shouted, “Blessed are those who see no evil, hear no evil and tell no evil” The fellow church member replied, "Amen, for they shall receive their equal share"
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10-27-2011 05:04 by
KISSTOPHER
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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a bucket of sh!t?? The bucket..
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10-27-2011 03:19 by
pistmyself
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My neighbors always listen to deep-throat movies with the volume cranked up all the way...whether they want to or not !!
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10-27-2011 02:51 by
pistmyself
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a Guy to a Beggar: "I think you beg because you are just too lazy to find a job" Beggar: "I beg to differ"
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10-27-2011 02:34
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Being pretty doesn't mean sh!t if you are a ho.
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10-27-2011 01:33
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I guess in the shower Steven Tyler doesnt know how to "walk This Way: without falling down
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10-27-2011 01:28 by
Eddy
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The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to arm bears.
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10-27-2011 00:57 by
NJS
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I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did
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10-27-2011 00:54 by
NJS
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Pleas turn your mobile phone upside down now!!! Hurry 370HSSV 0773H
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10-27-2011 00:50 by
Eddy
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2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout "air in the hands mother stickers this is a f**k up!!!!
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10-26-2011 23:24
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