Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Laughing for 15 seconds adds 2 days to your life span. Therefore, I am immortal.
←Rate | 11-22-2011 06:53 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon If your depressed about the world, remember that sea otters hold hands so they dont float away while sleeping
←Rate | 11-22-2011 06:51 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon How come Italian's don't like Jehovah witnesses?They don't like any witnesses.
←Rate | 11-22-2011 06:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What do you get when you cross an Italian and a Pollack?A guy who makes you an offer you can't understand.
←Rate | 11-22-2011 06:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wife: "hunny, I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear" . . . husband: "kitchen, living room, dining room, bed room, should I keep going?" . . .
←Rate | 11-22-2011 03:05 by greekgodess84 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I know I joke around on facebook with status's about women but deap down I think the greatest thing a man can ever learn, Is how to love a woman and the feeling of being loved in return!
←Rate | 11-22-2011 01:50 by lkleep Comments (0)  


   messageicon So NBC has signed an agreement to remake 'The Munsters.' Don't we already have a show about a family of clueless monsters? I think it's called 'Keeping Up With The Kardashians'.
←Rate | 11-22-2011 01:16 by Marla Comments (0)  


   messageicon 99% percent of Republicans think that they are Rich...1% are.
←Rate | 11-22-2011 00:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish I could see myself from a woman's perspective.
←Rate | 11-22-2011 00:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The cat stole my chair but I didn't want to move him because he looked so comfy so all I could do was pepper-spray him right in the face.
←Rate | 11-21-2011 23:51 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Crap, out of toliet paper again..send help
←Rate | 11-21-2011 23:34 by Foley Comments (0)  


   messageicon if Darth Vader was really black would he have admitted to being Luke's father?
←Rate | 11-21-2011 23:17 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cain's plan: Nine, nine, nine. OBama's plan: none,none,none.
←Rate | 11-21-2011 23:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet the bright side gets really sick of being looked at.
←Rate | 11-21-2011 23:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I smashed my finger today, "just glad it wasn't my "Have a nice day" finger
←Rate | 11-21-2011 22:04 by @BoyGotJokes Comments (0)  


   messageicon about to go eat me some vegetables ... which according to Congress is now a pizza
←Rate | 11-21-2011 21:54 by jaiya nick Comments (0)  


   messageicon Coming soon: Turkey!
←Rate | 11-21-2011 20:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I wish I really was the last man on Earth, just to see if all those women really were serious...
←Rate | 11-21-2011 20:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Think about this. Somebody in the world right now couldn't imagine life without you. That alone should give you the strength to smile.
←Rate | 11-21-2011 20:13 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon children are God's way of punishing us for having sex.
←Rate | 11-21-2011 19:37 by LauraP Comments (0)  



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