Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   if her rims are worth more than her car, she's too hood for you bro

   I am more bored than an Easter Bunny in December.

   It wasn't my fault I got drunk!!! I was thirsty ;) x

   I refuse to go bungee jumping...I came into this world because of a broken rubber, I'm not leaving because of one!!

   Don't be unhappy if your dreams never come true -- just be thankful your nightmares don't.

   There are no "good people"....Only good bullsh*tters.

   Damn you Migasjoe and your BookOfTebow!

   Dude, quit posting your stupid Tebow crap.

   Dear therapist, I might actually come see you if your job title didn't spell out, “The rapist” Sincerely, not lying down.

   Facebook just suggested I be friends with my ex. I marked it 'Offensive

   For what was impossible with Orton is possible with me! BookofTebow 12:9

   when you doubt thy will thy kicker will kick in the name of justice and righteousness with the right leg of victory BookOFTebow 31:17

   Thy shall never lose ones faith, no matter the deficit. Thy messiah shall leadith you to the promise land of the endzone. BookOfTebow 16:32

   "I wasn't that drunk." ... "Dude you destroyed my moms garden while yelling, "F**K farmville!"

   "Celebrating the 10 year anniversary working for this company!" - Best answer to the "where do you see yourself in 10 years?" job interview question. :)

   It's no coincidence that that Tebow's kicker's name is a cross between Prayer & Fate

   Trust in me, and I shall make thine enemies fumble. BookOfTebow 24:6

   The ppl of Galilee spoke of a man who turned water to wine. The ppl of Denver speak of a man who turned water into wins. BookofTebow 10:3

   And the Kicker known as Prater shall carry the messiah into overtime. Book of Tebow 3:15

   Be strong & courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of the defense, for Tebow will tuck and run. Book of Tebow 3:52