Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 4117 of 5594

   messageicon If you smile in Wal Mart and you have teeth everyone will think you're fancy.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 19:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon TEACHER: what is the opposite of laughing? STUDENT: fu*king... TEACHER: why is that? STUDENT: well laughing is Ha Ha Ha and fu*king is Ah Ah Ah ....
←Rate | 12-17-2011 19:05 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon look people It's spelled B-E-F-O-R-E, not B4... we speak English, not bingo
←Rate | 12-17-2011 19:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Santa I was not naughty, I was merely thinking outside the box!!
←Rate | 12-17-2011 19:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a fat man in a red suit comes and grabs you and stuffs you into a bag, dont worry. He just read my wish list. :)
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:59 by ghl19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What did one ocean say to the other ocean?...Nothing they just waved...Do you SEA what I did there?...I'm SHORE you did, BEACH.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:57 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow! Only seven more shopping days until it's Christmas! I wish that I could afford to buy each and every one of you a very expensive, extravagant gift! I wouldn't, but do I just wish I could afford to, if I wanted.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sure it looks like an innocent candy cane now, but give me 5-7 minutes and it'll be a dagger I can take out my enemies with.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:35 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life is a comedy for those who think, a tragedy for those who feel, and a pie eating contest for me.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:34 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've never actually seen anyone using a laptop on top of their lap.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:33 by MTQ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being single is great! Except for the paying for everything yourself part.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:32 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dropped my laptop in the ocean, So now theres a dell rolling in the deep.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:32 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon To get back at the boss for no Christmas bonus, my goal is to rub my balls on everything in his office by New Years. Luckily I started in June.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:31 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon After refreshing for hours, I just realized that this might be the new layout..
←Rate | 12-17-2011 17:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon RIP Slim Dunkin...Thank God it was not the Doughnut!!!
←Rate | 12-17-2011 17:16 by @toddtobin Comments (0)  


   messageicon Your outlook determines your outcome!
←Rate | 12-17-2011 17:15 by Joe Cool Comments (0)  


   messageicon The republican party... I'm sorry I thought we were telling jokes
←Rate | 12-17-2011 17:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Christmas shopping for your parents isnt easy. I mean, what DO you buy someone who has the perfect gift. Like me, for example
←Rate | 12-17-2011 16:42 by lbdp18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Imagine if you had the Facebook Master account for one day
←Rate | 12-17-2011 16:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you dont like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree...
←Rate | 12-17-2011 16:20 Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left