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Should I be worried that Santa just de-friended me?
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12-24-2011 11:35
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Why is my wife asking me for a watch for christmas? She already has one on the microwave and oven!
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12-24-2011 11:02
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Dear Santa, I would like a thin body and a fat bank account. Don't mix it up this year!
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12-24-2011 10:51 by
Memz
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Of course I have life goals...they just have NHL level goalies blocking them.
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12-24-2011 10:42 by
@mohammedsaneer
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I believe that I am the only one that gets that Walmart buggy with the deformed wheel.
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12-24-2011 10:30
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Just a quick post, to wish you all a merry politically-correct non-denominational 'Winterfest'-type holiday, and a happy Gregorian calendar reset.
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12-24-2011 09:51
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The plot in 16 Candles wouldn't work now because Facebook would remind everyone it was Molly Ringwald's birthday.
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12-24-2011 09:22 by
SuthernFukr
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Christmas Eve. As we they in San Francisco: May the corpulent bearded homo sapien in the scarlet suit smile upon your chosen shrubbery.
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12-24-2011 09:21 by
SuthernFukr
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I may not be everyone's cup of tea, but I am everyone's great big bag of weed when they come home for the holidays.
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12-24-2011 09:19 by
SuthernFukr
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Christmas and St. Paddy's Day are the busy season for midgets.
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12-24-2011 09:18 by
SuthernFukr
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As a kid, did you ever see Santa claw himself down the chimney and make fun of your pyjamas? My shrink claims it never happened!
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12-24-2011 09:15 by
SuthernFukr
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Today on Maury! Joseph was engaged to Mary-then learned she's pregnant! You won't BELIEVE who she says the Baby Daddy is!
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12-24-2011 05:18 by
flinnie
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I just hung a stocking by my chimney but instead of using "care" I hung it with total disregard for human safety.
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12-24-2011 05:15 by
flinnie
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I never realized how easily I bruise until I played Angry Birds with the sound on around other people.
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12-24-2011 05:13 by
flinnie
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My New Year's Resolution, like always, will be to avoid a unicorn herd attack. I have a good feeling 2012 will be the year.
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12-24-2011 05:12 by
flinnie
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You should appreciate my sacrasm, if I told you the truth it would be a HUGE blow to your self esteem.
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12-24-2011 04:27
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Dec 24th , Christmas Eve , the most exciting day of the year no matter how old you are .......
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12-24-2011 03:34
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If you want rant and rave go elsewhere, this is for funny material... or I'll hold you down and fart in your mouth.
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12-24-2011 00:36 by
RomeoThom
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Today, my mother commented "loser" on my Facebook profile picture. She got 41 likes.
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12-23-2011 22:37 by
BEGO
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Today, I heard someone calling my name. It was my neighbor. Turns out they named their dogs after my mother, my sister and me.
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12-23-2011 22:36 by
BEGO
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