It's that time of year again when our thoughts should turn to those less well off in our towns and cities, so remember to lock your doors and windows...
Whenever I go to WalMart I like to wear jeans with no stains, a freshly washed shirt and shoes that tie so I can listen to all the other shoppers say, "Hey, check out the rich guy."
FYI: If you are ahead of me in the checkout line and you tell me that you are sorry but you will be right back because you forgot something I bet you won't be back faster than I can't rub your apples under my arm pits and fart on your french bread.
You always know when you come across a ghetto b!tch. They don't have inside voices. They only have "I wanna make sure everyone f*cking hears this" voices.
You dadburn dumb city folk, ye ain't spose to git' all nervous like when yee hear banjers....... It's when ye don'ts hear 'em is when weez a slipp'in up on ye..... Yeeeea doggy!