g0re Funny Status Messages

   ou know you're lazy when you don't have any clean bowls so you eat cereal off a plate.

   It's the little things that make life so beautiful, like when a baby steps on a cat and they both go apesh!t

   Haters gon' hate, potatoes gon' potate.

   In elementary, there always seemed to be that one kid who had to deepthroat the water fountain when getting a drink.

   It seems like medicine manufacturers have never tasted freaking fruit before. Funny, I don't remember cherries tasting like an a$$.

   It's time for Dora to discover Google Maps.

   Anything that comes in a spray can doubles as a bug killer.

   The brain is the most important organ you have...According to the brain.

   When someone can't pick you up, it's easier to call them weak than to admit that you're fat.

   We all have that one class where when you're absent, you feel like you've missed a year when you come back.

   They call them "pizza rolls" because"pizza love handles" was too wordy.

   Telling a child to sit in the corner and think about what they've done is not a punishment: all it does is give the child time to come up with a better plan for next time.

   If you suspect someone has the power to read minds, then just play Never Gonna Give You Up in your head so they will get Rick-Rolled trying to read your thoughts.

   There's always that one annoying kid that says "Present!" instead of"Here!"

   I liked your post...until this happened :) xD lol <3 <33!

   It would be funny if someone calls"shotgun", and you were to just yell"Rosa Parks", get in the front seat, and refuse to move?

   Napoleon is the only Dynamite that is never going to bang.

   Everytime you use the handicap stall you secretly hope no one in a wheelchair comes in.

   If Patrick Star was running for president, his motto could be "We should take all of our problems, and move them somewhere else!"

   The most annoying thing is when you get a pimple on your nose, like I would rather get a pimple any where else but...