Search results for status messages containing 'Marshall the Great': View All Messages Page: 101 of 134
I read a caption in the paper the other day. The caption read, "In the time it takes you to finish reading this sentence, 20 people will have died of hunger." How the hell do they know how fast I read? I had to read it again. I killed 40 f*cking people.
Thank you: hard shell tacos, for surviving the factory, delivery trucks, and small food stores and then breaking the the moment I put something inside you.
My girlfriend goes out and buys me 12 underwear of the same color. I said, "Why in the hell did you buy all of them in the same color? People will think I never change them." My girlfriend: Which people? :\
I find those "No shirt, no shoes, no service" signs very misleading because they never say anything about having to wear pants. Apparently, I was wrong... now gotta go to court on Thursday...
Next time you try talking to a group of people who claim they can't speak English, just say, “Ok, I'm about to punch everyone who's shoes are untied.” You'll be amazed at how many people will look down.