truebeachbabe Funny Status Messages

   I may not be perfect, but Jesus thinks I'm to die for.

   We put a man on the moon, but we don't have roll down windows in the back of minivans yet??

   Please don't say "Firecracker". It's very offensive. It is a Fire Caucasian. Thank you.

   Only you can prevent forrest fires! Seriously though because Smokey the Bear has been furloughed.

   You know how people look through medicine cabinets? I think that's weird. I personally would rather look through their fridge.

   I think you have a deficiency in vitamin me.

   I was going to let you in front of me, but then I saw your Obama bumper & decided I didn't need a stupid driver in front of me this morning.

   You couldn't handle me, even if I came with instructions.

   Pikachu? Come to my backyard and get a Glockatchu!

   Drove past a rehab center this morning. I couldn't stop laughing at the sign out front: "Stay Off the Grass".