hoosiergatorfan Funny Status Messages

   Chris Hansen has been caught cheating on his wife, it's a good thing she wasn't underage or that would've been awkward.

   waiting to see the FB pics from Casey Anthony going out tonight.

   guessing the men on the jury were confused when they were asked if they wanted to get Casey off

   happy to see that Octomom's Today Show interview cut short by the space shuttle launch. Why is she still on the news? It's not like she killed one of them, did she?

   Meatloaf passed out at another concert, but wouldn't cancel the show. No he won't do that, oh no, he won't do that.

   Snooki is coming out with her new line of perfume, for when you want to smell like shame, selt-tanner, and herpies.

   He doesn't want to believe that someone as horrible as Gaddafi could have a comeback, but hell, the Smurfs did it. 

   thinking about seeing the movie Fright Night. It's filled with vampires, great jokes and hot girls in their underwear. Just like my mind

   a sneaking suspicion that we've read this before. if you read them here 5 or 10 pages ago odds are we did too.

   shocked to hear that R.E.M. just broke up, No wait, I was shocked to hear that they were still together to be able to break up. 

   been getting a lot of calls and texts about R.E.M.'s break up, relax people, it's not the end of the world as we know it.

   Google became a teenager today, so prepare yourself for it to become unreliable, moody, and unresponsive to your questions. Happy 13th BDay Google

   just read that A.C. Nielsen Jr., pioneer of TV ratings firm, died yesterday as well, but due to news of Steve Jobs it was overlooked and Mr. Nielsen only received an 8.5 rating.

   just purchased one of those anti-bullying bracelets to show support, Okay, Fine I didn't buy it. I stole it from a short, fat, little Ginger kid

   second guessed over 80% of the decisions that I have made in life. Maybe 90%.

   that BeachBody has signed a deal with Linda Blair for a new workout video just in time for Halloween called "P90Xorcism"

   thinking I should write a book about living with A.D.D., because I love home renovation. #squirrel 

   at lunch and saw a Mexican guy with a mullet. Negocio in the front, fiesta in the back.

   now that the NBA is back in action, it gives black guys a chance to dribble on something other than Lisa Lampanelli

   uncertain of what the etiquette is here, I got Kim Jong Il's name in Secret Santa.