Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   hates it when people are late...i feel like their stealing my a piece of my life

   as confused as a cow on astro turf

   it doesn't matter how poor you are...if you've got family...your rich

   good girls go to heaven but bad girls go EVERYWHERE

   's happy-go-lucky attitude is proof positive of better living through pharmaceuticals!

   life is precious...waste it wisely

   going to be bulletproof next time

   wishes he could grow hair out of his ears. Girls love a mature and well established man, and whats more mature and well established than a guy with ear hair?

   thinks that Americans would 'shake' the image of being overweight and lazy if we had to peddle in order to power our computers, thus making us all in shape.

   on the top of the world, looking down on creation...

   found Waldo!

   if love is blind why is lingerie so popular

   if you want to know anything then come to my house because i've got a teenager here who knows everything

   if rabbits feet are so lucky, what happened to the rabbit?

   it isn't true that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, it's through his chest...with an axe.

   friends are like rocks, be careful how you treat them because one day you might realise you have lost a diamond

   has been cleaning so much that she must have 2 ugly step-sisters somewhere...

   says, "the sun can kiss the moon goodbye, a flower can kiss a butterfly, wine can kiss a frosted glass, and you, my friend, can kiss my ass!"

   billy jean may not have been his lover, but he sure loved gettin in lil billy's jeans...

   wonders if you can grow weed on Farm Town and sell it on Dope Wars