sully Funny Status Messages

   Lost a couple FB friends overnight. Hopefully they just died and it wasn't something I said...

   Say what you want about Lance Armstrong, but I think being the first man to walk on the Moon is an amazing achievement. They can never take that away from him...

   HURRICANE Tip: Make certain to create a giant "X" with duct tape on all your windows to alert neighbors you are an idiot.....

   Memo to New Orleans: You can't turn the Superdome into a sewer this time., emergency shelter will be at Tom Benson's house....

   Look, if we all work together, we can lift and move New Orleans to a new location...

   The East Nile virus is apparently not as deadly or notorious?

   Never underestimate a Cat 1 Hurricane: I've never seen a situation involving one cat, water & a blow dryer end well..

   Wife and grandchildren are out of town. I'm eating ice cream for breakfast in my whitie tighties, I'm the man of the house now!!

   I am better off now than I was 4 beers ago...

   "All gave some, and some gave all" Remember 9/11......

   Personally, I think today should be "Cap a Diaperhead" day! Just saying

   No special plans tonight, but I'm thinking about throwing rocks at a foreign embassy and then grilling some burgers. Hit me up if you wanna join? My mom is coming too....

   Working on my (throwing rocks at) people skills....Just in case

   Be nice to your stalker. They just want to be loved...

   Dear Lord.....Please lead the NFL out of this referee lockout and deliver us scab free officiating. Amen.

   Apparently the NFL replacement Refs now work as tape-delay guys at Fox News....

   What the hell is a Honey Boo Boo? And can it get me high?

   In Honor Of Tonight's Debate, I Will Be Making "Obama Rolls".... They Consist Of A lot Of Hot Air, And Full Of Sh*t!

   Global Bacon shortage better be the first debate question tonight, and I WANT ANSWERS! No lies....

   I was feeling a little under the weather. But surprisingly, I got down from my desk chair and I felt better? It must have been the high altitude.....