g0re Funny Status Messages

   Have you ever noticed that Velma(from Scooby-Doo) only says who the bad guy is after she pulls off their mask. And then conveniently knew it was him or her all along.

   Overhearing someone ask their friend a question sucks when you know the answer, but can't exhibit your amazing knowledge without seeming like a weirdo for listening to their conversation.

   You feel safer when you're wearing clothes, even though they don't actually offer very much protection.

   It's better to have loved and lost than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography,

   Some girls need to realize that having fat on their bodies doesn't make them fat - it makes them alive.

   Its a bit awkward when you don't realize how many curse words and sexual innuendos a song has in it until you're in the car listening to it with your parents.

   The cheaper the phone, the harder it is to break.

   When you're trick-or-treating, it kind of makes you sad if the people handing out candy are younger than you.

   You know what a lot of words mean, it's just really hard to explain it

   Why don't blind people go skydiving? Because it scares the hell out of their dog.

   How come rappers always brag about being criminals and committing crimes, but then whine like little babies when people illegally download their music. Dang hypocrites.

   Don't you hate when you put some much work and effort into an assignment and still fail it miserably.

   It's got to be interesting for those kids from Extreme Makeover: Home Edition when they become teenagers Imagine trying to bring a girl back to your place. "Hey baby, ever done it in a bed shaped like a T-Rex's head?"

   Even though they so many people die because of alcohol, you never think about how many of them are born because of it.

   If M&M's came in white wrappers, there would be too many punchlines to the beginning of this sentence.

   It was better back when you could look under a bottle cap and see you won instantly, rather than this entering a code online thing they have now. I want to look under the cap and see "YOU WON!" instead of ED34GH....

   Childhood is like being drunk. Everybody remembers it except you..

   There comes a time when you just look at yourself in the mirror, and say"f**k it, this is as good as it's gonna get.".

   Sometimes, you have to hear a song twice before you decide you like it.

   It's kind of sad that they replaced Mailbox on Blue's Clues with e-mail.