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To catch me, you gotta be fast; to find me, you gotta be smart; but to BE ME!! DAMN! You must be kidding! 
hosting a time travel seminar, the first meeting is last week.......
as much authority as the Pope, he just doesn't have as many people who believe it
picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
One man's toxic sludge is another man's potpourri
only shoplifting discount stores, because jail sentences are based on cost of goods stolen.
being chased by a hungry pack of wild poodles!
blowing stuff up with his mind....
dreams of the day a chicken can cross the road without having his motives questioned...
not interest in Greys Anatomy, thank you...
busy Saving Humanity from the Evil Decepticons
in a relationship with Jack Daniel's.
the reason Waldo is hiding
the reason for global warming
regrets to inform you that due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
can flip it and reverse it
38 years old and still doesn't need glasses . . . I just drink straight out of the bottle!
wondering why his daughter's diaper holds no where near the 22-37 pounds it promises.
trying to stop being indecisive, but is not sure about it...
can now be brought to you in HD.
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