Funny Status Messages

   reading the dictionary; Ritardando; musical term meaning 'gradually slower'.

   Turns out the silver lining in cloud is made of lead, so now it is condemned and all hope it lost!

   This account has been removed indefinitly for violations of our rules and regulations. If you see this user with a different account please inform our staff.

   Awesome ends with ME

   Sex is a Misdermeaner. The more I miss, der meaner I get!

   wondering if its cool for people in China to get English word tattooes.

   "If the invisible man knocks on the door, tell him I can't see him at the moment."

   watching the marathon and saw one runner dressed as a chicken and another runner dressed as an egg. He thought: 'This could be interesting'

   gunna dress up as kanye west for halloween and go around telling people " ima letchu get back to trick or treatin in a minute but, barrack obamas daughters have the best halloween costumes of all time, of all time!!!"

   We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police.

   doesnt have a control button on his keyboard because he's "always in control"

   wants you to take that R2 unit to Anchorhead and have it's memory erased. That'll be the end of it. It belongs to us now.

   This account has been suspended and is under review for violations of the Facebook Terms of Service (TOS). To review the TOS for yourself, please feel free to click the Terms link at the bottom of each page. Inbox items and well feed posts will be visible

   thinks it's funny that "LOL" has gone from meaning "Laugh Out Loud" to "I have Nothing Else To Say"

   wonders why men never want to play with the baby, just the box it came in!

   money cant by harmony and happiness, but I can buy rum!!

   if you ever feel bad or depressed, just remember you were once the fastest most victorious sperm in the bunch!!

   We were strangers when we met, now were even stranger!!

   Wishes life was like a Nintendo game, if you had a problem you just take it out and blow on it. And everything would be fine

   running dangerously low on cheetos