Dylan Bosch Funny Status Messages

   Steve Martin had his first kid today at the age of 67... and that is how it's done. Happy Valent Times day to him."

   There is a fine line between being a nice guy and being a little b*tch."

   I Never understood why people watch porn together while having sex. If I have porn then what the hell do I need with another person?"

   Sometimes I don't know what I'd do w/o Netflix on nights I don't go out to the bars and party.... probably go out to the bars and party."

   I don't care when a girl puts me in 'the friend', 'creeper' or 'getting a restraining order against zone'... it's their loss, not mine."

   maybe Disney should start having there girls sign contracts before making them famous. Like, "I Promise I will not be America's next pop wh*re if I get this part..."

   I dont understand banks. Why do they attach chains to their pens? If I'm trusting you with my money, you should at least trust me with your damn pens!"

   So Wake me up when I am Sober, When I'm not so drunk and so hungover. This Entire time I didn't know I was getting so tore up. This entire time I didn't know I was getting this f**ked up... I didn't know, I didn't know!..." ♫

   I imagine love is like hearing your favorite song for the first time. Then Listening to it over and over again till you hate that song."

   I live my life with no regrets. I apologize for nothing. I'm sorry but that's just the way it is!"

   If you're wondering about who the oldest James Bond was, don't google 'old man bond age'

   Eggnog!.. The only b*tch I'm excited to hear back from after 9 months of absence."

   My current clothing style is a combination of "sh*t I'm late", "sh*t it's cold", with just a hint of "I'm too lazy to look socially acceptable for you losers".

   Did I log into Facebook or Pinterest? I'll tell you what color that dress is.. It's who and why do you all give a f**k!"