Samir Momin Funny Status Messages

   Wishes he was a white crayon, so no one would use me...

   a war baby. My parents took one look at me and started fighting

   Dear Santa: How much for your list with all the naughty girls on it?

   I think I overdosed on my family.....Santa has the right idea....only visit some ppl once a year.....

   enjoying a nice bottle of vintage DayQuil '09. The texture is like honey, taste like crap with touch of lemon

   if you're just gonna quit going to the gym in a couple weeks then please don't pack the gyms now. thanks!

   if you are over weight and have trouble going up stairs, put a biscuit on each step....

   too bad the minn didnt win...i wanted to see favre get a ring this year....but ok well...you brett...go ahead and retire now for and come back b4 the start of next year...

   Guys are like a snow storm, you never know how many inches you're going to get or how long it will last.

   Please dont poke me if you a guy...Thx!

   there are plenty of fish in the sea, too bad i'm a shark...

   You know the saying "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" ..... well for girls its " Why buy the whole pig, when all ur gonna get is a lil sausage...

   I serve my "fck you's" with a smile. It just has a better effect that way. Don't you think?

   FAT CHICKS ARE LIKE MOPEDS, THERE ARE FUN AND GAMES UNTIL YOUR FRIENDS CATCH YOU RIDIN ONE.....

   I understand you got your swag on, but could you walk a lil faster...?

   ever noticed on sponge bob that krusty crab is in bikini bottom...?

   I dont have an attitude you just get on my damn nerves....

   IT ME OR WHENEVER YOU PULL OUT A PACK OF GUM EVERYONE IS SUDDENLY YOUR FRIEND??

   Dear Tequila: We had a deal. You were supposed to make me sexier, smarter and a better dancer. But I saw the video. And I think we need to talk...

   On relationship status they should have "is getting played by_____________"