Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Disappointment is coming home to the smell of fresh bake cookies and finding out it's just a scented candel.
←Rate | 11-11-2018 05:21 by Ha.ha Comments (0)  


   messageicon Aliens probably lock their doors when they ride past earth.
←Rate | 11-13-2018 14:11 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Airport security asked me if I'd seen anything unusual. Well, I just paid eighteen dollars for a turkey sandwich and a bottle of beer, let's start with that.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 10:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Silver Lining: A 350 credit score prevents Identity theft! just saying
←Rate | 11-10-2018 22:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon it just me, or is anyone else finding it difficult to log on to dyslexics.moc?
←Rate | 11-11-2018 20:21 by Truman Comments (0)  


   messageicon In Florida we get "I'm still voting" stickers.
←Rate | 11-14-2018 13:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon How do you tell someone you love them without them making it weird that you're under their bed
←Rate | 11-14-2018 11:48 Comments (1)  


   messageicon . Fun fact Smokey the bear's original name was Hotfoot Teddy.
←Rate | 11-12-2018 23:00 by Fun.Fact Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm assuming lube is for people who can't spit.
←Rate | 11-13-2018 14:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some recipes are like science fiction. I read to the end and think "Well, that's not going to happen."
←Rate | 11-12-2018 09:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sorry you brought logic to a wife fight
←Rate | 11-14-2018 11:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Aggravation: Trying to get a vending machine to take a wrinkled dollar bill.
←Rate | 11-11-2018 22:24 by Ha.ha Comments (0)  


   messageicon If people would just give ugly people a chance and date them too, catfishing wouldn't be a thing.
←Rate | 11-14-2018 11:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think some of my friends are completely irrational and make bad decisions, and we should hang out more.
←Rate | 11-13-2018 13:35 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd just like to congratulate the person that invented the wobbly restaurant table! They're basically everywhere now!
←Rate | 11-06-2018 04:46 by Truman Comments (0)  


   messageicon So after winning the game I decided to throw the ball into the crowd like they do on TV. Apparently, this is unacceptable in bowling.
←Rate | 11-10-2018 18:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I voted and didn’t take a picture, did I really vote?
←Rate | 11-06-2018 18:53 by BWood Comments (2)  


   messageicon When I was a kid I figured out how to play the piano by ear. After a while I learned that it was easier to use my fingers.
←Rate | 10-31-2017 06:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remember me in your Prayers like you do in your Gossips.
←Rate | 09-12-2018 06:28 by raman911 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just got catcalled by a construction worker, again. Why can't men realize that we just want to walk down the sidewalk without someone calling out "hey that cement is wet!"
←Rate | 05-22-2018 07:59 Comments (0)  



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