Goodeolboy Funny Status Messages

   I call bravo Sierra on distance makes the heart grow fonder. Distance makes you have to do dishes and cook and stuff.

   Am I the only one that thinks some of the Japanese players will be executed? #fifa

   Had I had access to a smartphone growing up, I probably would have had an album titled "School Bus Window Artwork"

   Strange how people will judge stories like Tony Stewart, but try their damnedest to get out of jury duty...interesting.

   Shout out to all the deadbeat dads and sperm donors this Father's Day. Unbeknownst to you, there are kids everywhere that are becoming AMAZING PEOPLE because they want to be nothing like you.

   "Hey Bro, wanna go to lunch?" Sorry I can't, I'm on the Govt. Lunch Program....can't afford to eat :/

   Someone needs to tell all the other horses that its CC's birthday today.

   I'm not one to judge Brotha, but that white tailgate on your black truck screams "salvage title".

   Possible post if Facebook was around in 1983: DANGIT...street lights are on. Guess who's getting beat with a belt when he gets home :'(

   (Possible post if Facebook was around in 1979) Busy day today. Me and the boys are riding all over town on our bikes. Later we'll be at the lot playing Hot Wheels, so hit me up if you're in.

   Well, it's 12:30pm and I have seven dollar bills to my name. I guess it's that age old question: Lunch? Or Lotto scratchers.

   We've all seen that person on Social Media who likes to debate things as if they are a college professor. Dude...you're arguing with someone who uses "dat"

   Today's Pet Peeve: Overachieving seat belts.

   That 1/4 mile of blindness, before the defrost kicks in...

   Sorry I started a fight in the middle of your parking lot pARtyy- F.Gump

   Uh-huh...my underwear is!! -my excuse since Kindergarten. #stpattys

   You know you're country, when the smell of a dairy reminds you of Oreos.

   Shout out to the guy in drive thru who went against the man, and gave me THREE packets of Ketchup for my large fries.

   Breaking: Denver complaining of contact high...they swear.

   Kind of surprised the half time show wasn't performed by the Kottonmouth Kings.