Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon There’s a tunnel at the end of the light
←Rate | 05-24-2018 18:33 by NickD Comments (0)  

   messageicon When all is said and done, just remember, I am the Alpha of here. Only I can clean up what I want, when I want and who I want!
←Rate | 05-24-2018 17:55 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Morgan Freeman will be the narrator at his own trial.
←Rate | 05-24-2018 12:38 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The art of diplomacy is a lot harder than the art of the deal.
←Rate | 05-24-2018 11:57 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Florida and Texas send out a zombie alert to residents.
←Rate | 05-24-2018 04:04 Comments (1)  

   messageicon Starcents, it's like Starbucks only cheaper.
←Rate | 05-24-2018 03:24 by Jake Comments (1)  

   messageicon Will Starbucks become a homeless shelter with their new store policy?
←Rate | 05-24-2018 03:21 Comments (0)  

   messageicon One year ago a sinkhole open up outside Mar-a-lago. Now another one a year later on white house lawn. Could they be a portal to hell for donnie's annual evaluation with the devil?
←Rate | 05-24-2018 02:34 Comments (0)  

   messageicon (inventor of the ladder) I’m gonna french kiss that giraffe
←Rate | 05-24-2018 02:33 Comments (0)  

   messageicon *Opens box of cereal* We’ve updated our Privacy Policy
←Rate | 05-24-2018 02:09 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Can we talk about how crabs are too much stress for the little meat they give?
←Rate | 05-24-2018 02:08 Comments (0)  

   messageicon One year after a sinkhole outside of Mar-a-lago. Another one appears on white house north lawn. Could the devil becoming for donnie to take him back home?
←Rate | 05-24-2018 01:52 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Sinkhole appears on white house lawn when one of Melania's escape tunnels collapses
←Rate | 05-24-2018 01:24 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I think Alfred waa talking about c0nservatives when he said, 'some people just want to see the world burn'.
←Rate | 05-23-2018 18:18 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Cruelty is people with back pain having to bend over at the pharmacy to get a tube of Bengay from the bottom shelf.
←Rate | 05-22-2018 15:33 by Jake Comments (0)  

   messageicon Hey, Starbucks...looks like your “Open Borders” policy kinda failed miserably after 2 day’s, huh?! Imagine that...
←Rate | 05-22-2018 14:54 Comments (1)  

   messageicon People who blame autocorrect for their mistakes are just finger painting
←Rate | 05-22-2018 14:29 by @joeljeffrey Comments (0)  

   messageicon Today has me seriously evaluating my policy of not drinking on the job.
←Rate | 05-22-2018 13:04 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Not having sex is really ruining my sex life.
←Rate | 05-22-2018 12:41 Comments (0)  

   messageicon USA had 288 school shootings since 2009. In second place, we have France with 2. What are we doing wrong?
←Rate | 05-22-2018 11:36 Comments (5)  


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