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Smeebert Funny Status Messages
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a certain sign of who will wear the pants suit in your marriage is when the wedding reception has a Vegan menu and a gluten-free cake!
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07-30-2010 00:32 by
smeebert
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making Holy Water by boiling the Hell out of it.
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07-31-2010 03:42 by
smeebert
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I hate it when someone text me to call them, then when you call they never answer
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08-12-2010 00:35 by
smeebert
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Feds are indicting Clemens for perjury, said they knew he was on steriods when they saw his nose grow
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08-19-2010 16:13 by
smeebert
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Levi Johnston is part native, he just took back his apology to Palin
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08-26-2010 21:42 by
smeebert
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I bribed a cop this morning, handed him my drivers license with a doughnut underneath
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09-29-2010 20:51 by
smeebert
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before lady Di, I never heard of Paparazzi.., I thought it was a circus act or something
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11-13-2010 18:34 by
smeebert
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hates getting texts or calls on my iphone it interrupts my game, don't call me!
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11-23-2010 22:17 by
smeebert
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whoever dies with the most friends on facebook wins
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11-28-2010 17:50 by
smeebert
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Why do we protect movie ticket nerds behind 4inches of glass and a bank teller with only a pen on a chain?
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12-08-2010 13:04 by
smeebert
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making "fruitcakes" out of stuff I find under my sofa cushions
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12-08-2010 19:48 by
smeebert
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finding the Christmas spirit, now if only I can find someone who is in the giving mood to pay
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12-23-2010 20:07 by
smeebert
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if I wanted patience I would have been a doctor!
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01-11-2011 02:03 by
smeebert
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I just watched the "Notebook" & "Rudy" ...NO I didn't cry! but I want to go out for an ice cream now
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02-13-2011 01:35 by
smeebert
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You can always tell which friends have no life, you can never get a poke up on them.
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03-08-2011 14:04 by
smeebert
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I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart. Now what?
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04-10-2011 18:49 by
smeebert
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Met my new gf, a spark came between us…..WOW those taser guns are well worth the money!
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04-12-2011 03:44 by
smeebert
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You said you would go out with me only if it were our last day on earth... my pickup line tonight
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05-20-2011 23:48 by
smeebert
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BBQ rule: no drama goes on at my BBQ, if your'e in a fight with your mate don't come, if you just broke up and want to talk about it call a family member, BBQs are for FUN only
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06-01-2011 20:00 by
smeebert
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Watching this NBA game makes me miss the great Larry Bird days, now its all showboating and apparently there is an "I" in team.
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06-05-2011 21:46 by
smeebert
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