tsparks Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon If you never jumped from one couch to the other to save yourself from the lava then you didn't have a childhood
←Rate | 01-26-2012 18:55 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always learn from the mistake of others who take my advice
←Rate | 01-30-2012 13:04 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon That one minute party you have when the teacher leaves the room
←Rate | 11-16-2011 17:22 by tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon SCARIEST THING EVER: Flushing a toilet & seeing the water coming up instead of going down
←Rate | 01-31-2012 03:20 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not a Justin Bieber fan, I don't even like the music. But seriously, I'm sick of all the hating. I don't care how the singer looks like. I'm not defending anyone, but didn't your parents teach you to respect women?
←Rate | 02-02-2012 04:31 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon smaller the breasts, better the eye contact
←Rate | 11-16-2011 13:57 by tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you know "bathtub" backwards is still "bathtub"? It's not, but for a second there you believed me
←Rate | 02-20-2012 23:03 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dropped my wallet today & a homeless guy chased me down to give it back. I was so moved I took out all of my money & gave him a free wallet.
←Rate | 03-08-2012 11:58 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon *Low battery* *Low battery* *Low battery* Well apparently you have enough battery to Remind Me every 2 seconds
←Rate | 04-30-2012 17:05 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why post a picture on Facebook with the caption 'OMG I'm sooooooo ugly or fat' and then get annoyed when I agree?
←Rate | 04-13-2012 20:38 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon I went to Wal-Mart to buy shampoo. Spent $150 and forgot the shampoo
←Rate | 05-15-2012 18:45 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon i have learned that pleasing everyone is too hard, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake
←Rate | 11-16-2011 02:03 by tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon I failed the quiz by 1 point, the last question was " where do most women have curly hair" apparently the correct answer was "Africa"..
←Rate | 01-30-2012 13:08 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you know, That if you yell "bloody Mary" 3 times in front of ur mirror at 3AM ur mom will show up & tell you to shut up and go to bed?
←Rate | 02-03-2012 05:32 by Tsparks Comments (1)  


   messageicon I may look calm but in my head I've killed you 3 times
←Rate | 02-06-2012 15:13 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks that If I were a Jedi, I'd have long frizzy hair, red leather pants, and lots of attitude.. and I'd go by Obi-wan Bon Jovi
←Rate | 02-24-2012 17:11 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon I respect the person who let girls into the army. Girl on period + gun = unstoppable
←Rate | 01-30-2012 23:31 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before I lose my phone, end up naked, high, drunk and/or possibly arrested, I would like to wish all a Happy Saturday!
←Rate | 04-14-2012 10:08 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon why is it that when you fart silent somebody rushes towards you to talk, hugs you, or sits behind you??
←Rate | 02-01-2012 02:13 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon Everything seems to be louder, when you dont want anybody to wake up
←Rate | 02-04-2012 05:30 by Tsparks Comments (0)  



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