styles Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Filter On | Filter Off | No Trump

Search Messages:

Search results for status messages containing 'styles': View All Messages
Page: 1 of 2

   messageicon I don't usually brag about my finances, but my credit card company calls me almost every day to tell me my balance is outstanding
←Rate | 02-06-2015 23:55 by Styles Comments (1)  

   messageicon I love asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because I'm still looking for ideas.
←Rate | 02-06-2015 23:57 by Styles Comments (1)  

   messageicon I think the cats are hording all the single women out there... Happy Valentines Day everyone
←Rate | 02-14-2015 17:35 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon I remember back when the media didn't have to invent names like "polar vortex" to tell us that it is cold during winter...
←Rate | 01-07-2014 19:53 by styles Comments (1)  

   messageicon Just tried to check my Farmville for the first time in 2 years, apparently I forgot to pay my taxes and the IRS owns it now.
←Rate | 12-27-2014 08:21 by styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just finished putting the Ex-Lax in the candy
←Rate | 10-31-2013 10:05 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon Day 28: I am thankful for the fact that I do not have to see your 28 days of thankful posts for another year
←Rate | 11-28-2013 10:22 by styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon An atheist, vegan, and a cross fitter walk into a bar. I only know because they told everyone within 2 minutes....
←Rate | 12-26-2014 14:29 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon I drove by a house today that had about 15 of those inflatable Christmas lawn decorations. In the daytime it looks like there was a drive by shooting in the North Pole and there were no survivors
←Rate | 12-11-2014 18:52 by styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon Must be giraffe hunting season or something ....
←Rate | 10-28-2013 17:14 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon There is a new strain of Marijuana on the market now. It is called "The Obama". It is very expensive, powerful, and does not do anything
←Rate | 07-23-2014 12:45 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon He has risen!!! But only to use the bathroom, now I am going back to bed.
←Rate | 04-20-2014 10:55 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't want to rescue pets, farm, pop bubbles, or crush candy...
←Rate | 01-04-2014 19:41 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon First scoop of Mars soil contains 2% water, now all we need is malt, hops, and yeast and life would be all good.....
←Rate | 09-28-2013 08:29 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon I am so proud of my gun, I left it alone and it did not kill anyone
←Rate | 02-25-2014 11:21 by styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon Happy birthday America, so what are we offended by today?
←Rate | 07-04-2015 14:01 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon I can make beer disappear, what is your super power?
←Rate | 02-01-2015 17:18 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon 5 blocks and no one has given me any candy, this is going to be a long day..
←Rate | 10-31-2013 13:20 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon If Obama can break the rules, so can the Patriots dammit.
←Rate | 01-22-2015 09:17 by Styles Comments (0)  

   messageicon Tomorrow is National Half Priced Candy Corn Day
←Rate | 10-31-2013 13:30 by Styles Comments (0)  


[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Status Message:

... characters left