drew Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon If you leave a cupcake out long enough, it just becomes a cookie
←Rate | 10-14-2018 02:40 by Drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon trying to give me the finger is like giving a spider the web. I'm just gonna spin it and use it to my advantage =)
←Rate | 04-27-2010 20:34 by drew Comments (3)  

   messageicon Thank god this election is over......I almost forgot what real commercials were like.
←Rate | 11-09-2016 01:57 by DREW Comments (0)  

   messageicon I like vending machines 'cause snacks are better when they fall. If I buy a candy bar at a store, oftentimes, I will drop it... so that it achieves its maximum flavor potential.
←Rate | 05-23-2010 03:17 by drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon at the zoo today with all the little kids running around, oh wait a minute its just Walmart.
←Rate | 02-19-2011 20:50 by Drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon when I was a lil kid I thought picking toys in the toy store was hard, now that I turn 21 picking alcohol in the liquor store is harder.
←Rate | 05-09-2010 01:44 by drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon if you could have anything right now, what would you have? I want to have a healthy heart, to walk, to see, to hear, to have awesome friends and a wonderful family.....OH WAIT! I have that already so pretty much Nothing, man. I'm happy as is.
←Rate | 03-26-2010 00:24 by drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon The problem with us beautiful people is that most people hate us.
←Rate | 02-25-2011 14:12 by Drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon I haven't got a Twitter account yet, so I just carry around a megaphone and announce what I'm doing at random times. I've got three followers so far - but I think two are cops...
←Rate | 02-13-2013 14:29 by Drew Comments (1)  

   messageicon So...this new show called The Wall. Is this what Donald Trump was talking about the whole time? Advertising an hour long game show about Plinko?
←Rate | 01-10-2017 19:42 by DREW Comments (0)  

   messageicon My roommate said to me, 'I'm gonna go shave and use the shower; does anyone need to use the bathroom?' It's like some weird a## quiz where he reveals the answer first.
←Rate | 05-23-2010 03:13 by drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dear Lunchables, I remember when I was a kid I used to love eating you, now that I'm an adult, I realize now that you are just cheese and crackers and are nowhere near a full lunch, wtf was I thinking. Please update your lunchables to feed more than a sma
←Rate | 02-03-2011 17:10 by Drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's weird... people say they're not like apes. Now how do you explain football then?
←Rate | 05-23-2010 00:14 by drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you're close minded. Blind fold yourself as if there's nothin more to further see
←Rate | 04-08-2012 18:32 by DREW Comments (0)  

   messageicon amazed how unexpectedly and rapidly things can change. I am Gizmo and water was just splashed on me.
←Rate | 10-28-2010 19:51 by Drew Comments (0)  

   messageicon Thanks a bunch for sharing this with all people you really realize what you're speaking approximately! Bookmarked. Please also talk over with my website =). We may have a hyperlink change agreement among us manchester united tøj
←Rate | 05-14-2017 06:24 by Drew Comments (0)  


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