Tallmtnman Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Top 5 things I stare into: 1) My phone. 2) The fridge. 3) Space. 4) The abyss. 5) Your windows.
←Rate | 01-27-2017 11:19 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not saying she's bipolar, but it took me two hours to figure out her mood ring wasn't a strobe light.
←Rate | 10-31-2014 15:24 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Suddenly my prison fantasy football league just got real.
←Rate | 09-16-2014 10:50 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Anyone else wonder what happens to Oscar on trash day?
←Rate | 08-17-2013 13:40 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon The sales of sexbots have been skyrocketing. I wonder if they make an underage one? That's gonna be the hot seller among Hollywood and Democrats.
←Rate | 11-21-2017 15:28 by TallMtnMan Comments (4)  


   messageicon BREAKING NEWS: Reports seem to be premature that Barack Obama's nomination to replace Eric Holder will be Flavor Flav.
←Rate | 09-25-2014 18:00 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Adele: Hello. Lionel Richie : Hello is it me you're looking for? Pink Floyd : Hello. Hello. Is anybody in there? Me: This conference call sucks.
←Rate | 02-19-2016 11:57 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Has anyone else considered the romantic possibilities of nachos and naps?
←Rate | 01-11-2017 20:09 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon I said I was hungry, she thought I said I was horny. Long story short, best first date ever..
←Rate | 05-05-2015 10:24 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ok, I've never thought much of Hugh Hefner, but you have to appreciate the irony. The creator of Playboy expires on a Wednesday-Hump Day.
←Rate | 09-28-2017 12:44 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Former Ravens cheerleader arrested for having sex with 15 year old boy. Apparently her flirting style was to BE AGGRESSIVE, B-E AGGRESSIVE
←Rate | 11-06-2014 13:35 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Tiny tots with their eyes all aglow" sound terrifying.
←Rate | 11-20-2017 12:46 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wonder if A-Rod's new sponsor is going to be a syringe company...
←Rate | 08-06-2013 12:26 by TallMtnMan Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Denver Broncos today announced Al Bundy as their new starting Quarterback.
←Rate | 11-30-2017 13:49 by TallMtnMan Comments (3)  


   messageicon Battered women sounds taste, but it's just a bad idea.
←Rate | 03-27-2012 09:55 by tallmtnman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just been to the gym for the 5th time in a week, and people are saying things like "well done!", "that's so impressive!", and "you can't come in here just to use the vending machine
←Rate | 11-26-2017 10:59 by Tallmtnman Comments (1)  


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