Banjaxed Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Dear lady in front of me , It is a speed bump , not a freaking land mine
←Rate | 05-09-2011 07:22 by Banjaxed Comments (1)  


   messageicon How Many Blondes Does It Take To Change A Diaper......................Ask Hugh Hefner
←Rate | 12-05-2011 20:36 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had a happy childhood. My dad would put me inside a tire and then roll me down a hill. They were Goodyears
←Rate | 02-01-2012 12:50 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon OFF is the general direction in which I would like you to Fuck
←Rate | 01-09-2012 20:40 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon It is impossible to look cool while holding onto a leash attached to a dog who is taking a crap.
←Rate | 05-19-2011 22:25 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I may be old but I got to see all the cool bands
←Rate | 10-03-2011 21:53 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bought a pair of "Meatloaf" underwear today..on the front it says "I would do anything for Love" and on the back it says "But I wont do that"
←Rate | 11-22-2012 19:41 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon Either you love bacon or you're wrong
←Rate | 09-29-2011 21:52 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon Answered the door today and a giant grasshopper spit in my face and kicked me hard in the shin , I phoned my doctor and he said not to worry , there was a really nasty bug going around
←Rate | 12-09-2010 09:33 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was at Mcdonalds today when a rather large woman served me , when she finally gave me my order she said "sorry about the wait" and I said "Don't worry sweetheart , you'll lose it eventually"
←Rate | 11-16-2010 16:42 by Banjaxed Comments (1)  


   messageicon Every man should carry a sharp knfife , a sharp pen and a sharp tongue but only a gentlemen knows whe to use them
←Rate | 01-12-2011 07:29 by banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am so sick of Irish Stereotypes ....as soon as I finish this pint of Guinness I'm gonna punch someone in the face
←Rate | 03-17-2012 21:50 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I locked my coat hanger in the car...it's a good thing I carry a spare set of keys
←Rate | 02-15-2012 21:35 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife decided to take up violin with good intentions but she couldn't decide which chin to rest it on
←Rate | 06-21-2011 20:56 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon My Uncle always told me our side of the family had Irish Alzhiemers , That's where you forget everything but the grudge
←Rate | 08-14-2011 19:49 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon AMISH DRIVE BY SHOOTING:................."Clip Clop Clip Clop Clip Clop Clip Clop Cop....bang bang bang bang bang bang....Clip Clop Clip Clop Clip clop
←Rate | 11-07-2011 21:42 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I AM THE BOSS OF THIS HOUSE AND WHAT I SAY G.........hang on gotta go , I think I hear my wife coming
←Rate | 08-29-2011 21:07 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon Revenge .....Naaaaa , I'm too lazy , I'm just going to sit here and let Karma Fvck you up
←Rate | 01-31-2012 21:09 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon WARNING: if you see posts offering free clip of the new Nickelback album DO NOT CLICK. It links to a free clip of the new Nickelback album.
←Rate | 09-13-2011 22:19 by Banjaxed Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a fear of speed bumps but I'm slowly getting over it
←Rate | 07-06-2012 09:57 by banjaxed Comments (0)  



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