mark1965 Funny Status Messages

   approached a woman at the bar last night and asked her what she is looking for in a relationship. She yelled, "Security".

   knows why boy scouts don't sell cookies. Because nobody would eat a cookie with 'BS' on it.

   thinks the NFL should stop giving complimentary cutlery sets to the players wives and girlfriends.

   If you are wearing shorts or sweatpants that spell out "Bootylicious" across the hind side. Just an FYI - it's not.

   surprised that, during his press conference, Tiger didn't give thanks for being honored with the Enviromentalist of the Year Award. The one he recieved for picking up all that white trash.

   has an app for that.

   congratulates Tiger Woods on the 2009 PGA Playa' of the year award.

   suddenly has an urge to go for a balloon ride over Colorado.

   Black cats, ladders, broken mirrors, guys named Jason. I hate Friday the 13th.

   heard charges were pressed against James Ray. I bet he's sweating now.