Scarlet Funny Status Messages

   Thanks to procrastination, my schedule is always full.

   Justin Bieber won Artist of the Year at the American Music Awards. **snaps fingers** Mmm Hmmm You Go Girl!!

   I rarely get distracted, but the other . . . .brb.

   Due to 9 empty traps, today's planned Iron Chef Reindeer Challenge will be postponed.

   Better open some windows. I just ate "weapons grade" chilli!

   How ironic. Mark Zuckerberg (facebook creator) is Time Man of the Year. And Facebook is the thing that takes all our time!

   String theory is the basis of our universe?? So, God made us in a macramé class??

   Surely he's not dead! He is. And stop calling me Shirley. R.I.P. Leslie Neilsen.

   **chokehold, spin, slam to the floor** Hello Wednesday!!

   can't be bothered going to his Apathy Support Group today...