Oregon Funny Status Messages

   Now that a billonaire in Mexico is going to buy out Hostess the twinkie will come in 3 flavors. Hot, Medium and mild.

   Due to the economy......The 5 second rule has been upgraded to the 10 second rule. We just can't afford to be throwing away food....

   Can they make band aids that are easier and faster to unpack so I don't bleed to death?

   If our Government shuts down how much Electricity will we save?

   I am convinced that Kellogg's works for our Government and all that Snap, Crackle, Pop is CODE.......

   When are Levi's going away with "Shrink to Fit jeans" to my style..."Stretched to Fit"?

   Hey let me give a gift that will take a week to put together. I have included the manual and a DVD....Have Fun

   Dear Santa, Do not eat any cookies from Colorado and Washington this year.. May cause drowsiness.

   I miss the old days when everyone had the same RING tone.

   The song London Bridge Is Falling Down now makes sense!!

   Easter this Sunday....The one day where I can say "I am putting all my EGGS in one basket!

   Big bird is now out of "WITNESS PROTECTION"

   What happened in 2012 stays in 2012...

   why did the chicken cross the road? To show POSSUM's that it can be done!!

   People that look through other peoples medicine cabinets? WEIRD!~~ I would like to look through their fridge.

   When it's raining I don't work, when its sunny I don't work, when its cloudy I call in sick!

   What is up with all these Government drones? I can't even fly a freaking kite anymore.

   Stopped by the apple store to see if they have a better phone than the Samsung Galaxy S3......ilaughed

   OBAMA State Of the Union Address tonight!!! It is going to literally knock your Taxes off!!

   When OBAMA said he is going to get the jobs back from China were the jobs swimming back to America, because it is taking awhile