DJJIMBOFUNATANYBAR Funny Status Messages

   My girl said someone is trying to get into the house, should I call 911 ? I said no call 811. Why? Cause you always call miss Dig before digging a hole!

   The police.... The only people who ever wanted me for who I really am.

   Don't let a gerbil talk you into anything you don't want to do

   Joe exotic was going to do a Christmas song, But he hates carols

   What's the difference between most hispanics at the border and stoners? Storners have papers.....

   My ability to remember all of the lyrics from the 80s, Far exceeds my memory of why I just walked into the kitchen..

   Jeffrey Dahmer's bologna had a first name , it was Steven !

   Ive never seen a Dragon with fruit on it... I think its a scam by" big fruit " to get more $$$