Cyndi Funny Status Messages

   how are we gonna kill all the zombies if obama takes our guns away.

   I say let them burn ferguson to the ground and watch them cry tomorrow cause they don't have anywhere to spend their foodstamps.

   walk dead fans. ever notice that the grass out side is never high. so do zombies mow the grass when they are not eating brains. I dont mow my grass for 2 weeks and I cant see out my living room window.

   Are yall gonna watch Biden and the state of delusion address

   Every other countries policy: you don't work, you don't eat! USA policy: you work, you don't eat!

   Help me spread the word all over the internet that I am a millionaire. cause if its on the internet it has to be true.

   Ok word of advice ladies. a muffin top might be kinda cute but if you have a 3 tier cake top please don't go out side. you scare people. just sayin.

   in honor of it being 3 days into spring and so cold we will be barbecuing Punxsutawney Philly steak and cheese tomorrow

   How come no one has came up with a skeleton turkey inflatable with a santa hat on so you can put it out october 1st and take it down after Christmas.

   watching hard core pawn is like watching when animals attack. If this is what people in Detroit acts like we may need to put a border fence around it and just pay Canada to take it.

   If Hillary becomes president she will be the first F President. Oh, sorry. I was going to say female, but the "emale" got deleted.

   I'm gonna get a tshirt made that says ' I survived the end of the world and all I got was this lousy tshirt

   Anyone look in the mirror and it looks like you have hail damage on the back of your thighs . Asking for a friend.

   If CN N told you the only cure of covid-19 is to jump off a bridge. Which bridge are yall going to choose...

   fat is the new skinny

   Looks like facebook put itself in facebook jail

   If the Wuhan lab had been in Vegas we wouldn't have to worry about this virus cause what happen in vegas stays in vegas

   Anybody on Meth need a job??? I'm opening a haunted house soon & I need zombies

   Presidents day is canceled until we get one.

   Dr fauci just announced we all have to wear jock straps now to stop the spread of covid