Booger Funny Status Messages

   Are a bag of Skittles considered a serving of fruit? If so, I'm eating healthy today.

   My wife says I'm too nosey... at least, that's what she wrote in her diary.

   Who else puts LOL or LMAO or ROFL knowing good and damn well your sitting there with a straight face

   When you're stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate, and sweets. Why? Because STRESSED spelled backwards spells DESSERTS. ;)

   Think I'm going to ride a cow to work tomorrow .. trigger sum folks

   Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom

   I refuse to go bungee jumping... I came into this world because of a broken rubber, I'm not leaving because of one