father OR dad Funny Status Messages

   The celebration of single moms on fathers day blows me! Single moms do some amazing things but being a father isn't one of them.

   Happy Father's Day to all the single mothers who do both roles due to dead beat dads.

   Just sent out 200 text messages to random phone numbers saying "Happy Father's Day! I'm pregnant!" Now listening to the police scanner for my daily entertainment.

   Anyone who says single moms don't do both roles of a mother & father when the father doesn't spend time or money with his children is THE DEAD BEAT we are referring to!!

   I need to do something reproductive today. Happy Father's Day

   happy father's day to all my daddy's... no homo though

   I wonder what Lebron got Delonte West for Father's Day?

   Happy Father's Day to all the dads...and whoever's raising T.O.'s kids.

   Happy Ugly Father's day tie, day!

   Good mourning...... I hope everyone had a Happy Father's Day, oh..everyone except Jerry Sandusky!!

   A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying.

   Son: Dad, what does 'gay' means? Father: It means 'to be happy'. Son: Are you gay? Father: No, son. I have a wife.

   RIP ... George Jefferson.....Father of Swag

   I forgot to buckle my 5 year old up in the car today, and while leaving the parking lot, this guy yells, "You're an irresponsible father!". I was like, "What the hell is that guy's problem? Stop the car son!"

   You never see Micael Pelps's father in the stands because he is a dolphin.

   Just imagine if Usain Bolt was your father and you were trying to run away from a beating.

   When he was my age, my father had three kids, owned two businesses and a house. I can't even pull that off in 'The Sims'.

   Dear lady who says she will only date guys who drive Mercedes or BMW cars, yet your father drives a Hyundai; Why can't you be humble like your mother?

   ..... WOW ..... I just found my pet rock my father gave me back in the 70's ...... Amazingly enough it was STILL ALIVE!!!

   Any Woman that keeps her Kid from they Father is a Dead Beat mother too!!!