bego Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. She hadn't even called me; I saw the news on my Facebook news feed.
←Rate | 06-28-2012 23:09 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Make sure you love each other for your pleasant personalities coz when the looks are gone its what you will have to live with for the rest of your lives.
←Rate | 05-27-2013 13:09 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram sometimes make me forget I have text messages.
←Rate | 08-23-2012 22:21 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon If there were a pill for stupid....some people would have to take more than one.
←Rate | 07-01-2012 22:55 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who squirt Ketchup all over their fries instead of dipping them are not people you want in your life.
←Rate | 08-28-2013 21:09 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am sure that in alcohol are female hormones. When I drink I talk too much and dont know how to drive.
←Rate | 04-18-2012 22:27 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you didn't hear it with your OWN ears or see it with your OWN eyes, don't go passing it on with your OWN damn mouth!"
←Rate | 06-07-2011 22:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Teacher: From all this noise I assume you're done working Student: From all this b**ching I assume you're still single
←Rate | 06-13-2011 21:58 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yo Bi%ch, you hate your parents so much that you have to post it on Facebook. Orphans cry hearts out to have such loving and caring parents. Love your Parents.
←Rate | 02-08-2014 22:44 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon On a walk, my son saw a pay phone, asked what it was. I made him look it up on his Iphone..
←Rate | 08-19-2011 23:21 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a button on my microwave that says stop time. I assume its for the timer but I don't touch it just in case.
←Rate | 04-17-2012 21:03 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do you ever get the feeling your being watched? Because if its bothering you, I'll stop...
←Rate | 04-28-2012 22:13 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maan !! You're 20 years old & she's 15 years old, HOW COULD YOU CALL IT RELATIONSHIP ? IT'S BABYSITTING !
←Rate | 09-28-2011 22:12 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon At some point you outgrow feelings and you outgrow people. Its nothing personal. Its part of human nature. As much as we would want it to, nothing lasts forever.
←Rate | 05-15-2014 04:56 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon When my phone dies and I don’t have a charger, I might as well be Amish.
←Rate | 08-30-2014 23:03 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon About 50% of the time “good luck” really means “efff you.”
←Rate | 04-26-2011 10:48 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Marriage is hard. Marriage is so hard Nelson Mandela got divorce. He spend 27 years in prison getting tortured and beaten everyday of his life for 27 years. He got out of jail, spent 6 months with his wife, and said. I CANT TAKE THIS SHI%
←Rate | 12-13-2013 22:07 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Santa has elves. America has China.
←Rate | 07-30-2012 22:29 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just once, I would like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear... "Monday has been canceled, go back to sleep."
←Rate | 03-26-2012 21:25 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon A man's life is spent between episodes of women being mad at him.
←Rate | 06-19-2011 21:25 by BEGO Comments (0)  




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