Jitney Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Tip #12 for Halloween: Dont go dress-up as a toilet and walk in a bar when it just happened to be nickle beer night.
←Rate | 11-01-2012 02:15 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who is ready to celebrate "No More Campaing" Adds on Wednesday? Ive got the beer!
←Rate | 11-06-2012 01:28 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon BREAKING NEWS: The Last person just finished voting in Florida....
←Rate | 11-07-2012 00:30 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Im relocating to Colorado, I just heard the news; Colorado is now a weed state. I can smoke while voting next time around!
←Rate | 11-07-2012 00:32 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Reasons 1 why Florida is considered the "Pitbull" State by the Press....We have 3 categories of last minute of lazyass late voters: Latinos, Blacks and Senior Citizens. you can have 2months of early voting and that ish wont ever change!!!
←Rate | 11-07-2012 01:33 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Reasons 2 why Florida is considered the "Pitbull" State by the Press....You can expect 3 things to go wrong during voting: machine failures, not enough ballots printed out, and complicated procedures with late ballots count
←Rate | 11-07-2012 01:36 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon and Reason 3 why Florida still has no color,,,,You cant just predict anything in Florida, not the Weather, not the Casey Anthonys/Zimmerman or any Court cases... and definitely not the Elections running smoothly!
←Rate | 11-07-2012 01:40 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women dont say sorry, when a guy is right they say.... "Whatever!"
←Rate | 11-09-2012 17:30 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe I should come out with my own sex scandal.....Elmo, Patreaus, Penn State, Arnold, Tiger, Clinton.
←Rate | 11-13-2012 14:16 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Watching this growing TOP CIA scandal is proof that women secretly runs the world!!!
←Rate | 11-13-2012 19:32 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its like the Mayans knew this was coming........CIA has been compromise, No mo tickle me Elmo, and Slena went Str8 again
←Rate | 11-13-2012 19:58 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lets treat guns like printers, expensive ink and bullets! that way if you really shoot someone,....oh you really meant to kill them with this $3000 silver bullet!
←Rate | 11-15-2012 01:21 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon realize that when someone says, "The last thing I want to do is hurt you," basically implies that there is a list and hurting you is on it.
←Rate | 11-15-2012 16:07 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon I kinda wish I was sober enough to remember what really happened. One moment we was having fun, the next thing I knew, its Monday and I'm getting emails..... R.I.P - Saturday & Sunday
←Rate | 11-19-2012 12:20 by Jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon I really, really, really enjoy being off of work.
←Rate | 11-20-2012 14:11 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did anyone see Anderson Cooper reporting the news live from the heart of raining missles in Gaza. He looked so brave crouching behind the wall of his hotel balcony with his extra white hair....
←Rate | 11-21-2012 07:02 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girlfriend just caught me blow-drying my pennis and asked me what was I doing.....Apparently, "heating your dinner!" was not a good answer!
←Rate | 11-21-2012 15:31 by Jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don't want the answer to smack you straight in the mouth then I think it's probably best left un said!
←Rate | 12-12-2012 00:00 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Great first it was the Movie theater early this yr, then the Mall random shootings, no its kids at the elementary level...... Can we put praying back in school now?
←Rate | 12-14-2012 13:57 by Jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Her: Your Not listening!!!! Me: How can I listen to you if you dont say the things I want to hear...Woman????
←Rate | 12-14-2012 20:31 by jitney Comments (0)  




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