love Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Commercial idea : shaq in front of a mirror singing "love shaq, baby love shaq" into a hairbrush
←Rate | 06-13-2013 00:48 by hiyourjon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love is like wildflowers; It's often found in the most unlikely places, take the brothel for instance.
←Rate | 01-26-2011 19:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My new GF: "Wow, look at all this beer you have in your fridge. You must love to drink." Me: "No, I just hate to run out of beer."
←Rate | 11-27-2012 09:58 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women must love you because you are the biggest d!ck I have ever seen
←Rate | 05-20-2012 16:09 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  




   messageicon I love when my friends tell me they have 3 or 4 days off from work. Then want to make plans to go out and expect me to pay the bill because their check sucked. Well maybe your a$$ should of went to work instead of bragging about being off.
←Rate | 01-29-2012 15:05 by @Seanathon77 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you love someone set them free. Then lock the door so they cant get back in.
←Rate | 11-05-2015 00:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon who ever said that it takes two to fight never seen the crackhead at 7-11 yelling at the wall I love niagara falls
←Rate | 03-12-2011 18:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies: There is no sign language in love. If he didn't say it, he didn't mean it. Stop assuming and putting words into his mouth.
←Rate | 12-18-2011 00:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've always been told to dress for the job you want. I love my cape
←Rate | 03-19-2013 18:49 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love you, babe, of course you can get whatever you want...whoa, whoa, let's keep it on the dollar menu, though, ok?
←Rate | 01-28-2013 13:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every branch is full of hard-working intelligent people that always has our best interest in mind...I love the way our government it run. Are you getting this NSA?
←Rate | 06-12-2013 15:03 by M Comments (0)  


   messageicon That moment when you wake up the next morning laying in bed next to the one you just fell in love with and you lay there trying to remember their name? GOD I MISS MY 20'S!
←Rate | 05-24-2014 14:13 by scott92104 Comments (0)  


   messageicon " Don't forget to provide love and support to someone that has absolutely no interest in you today." I don't guarantee your front teeth after that.
←Rate | 03-31-2014 21:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon LOVE: If you need direction, search your heart. If you still can't find the answer, search through your significant other's sh!t.
←Rate | 10-02-2011 11:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll rather slip and fall in sh!t than fall in love with you!
←Rate | 03-10-2012 12:37 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I pretty much need a girl to love me for what's on the outside at this point. The inside has been broken for a while and I've been trying to fix it with booze ever since.
←Rate | 03-22-2012 13:33 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Paula Deen selling Diabetes Drugs is like Courtney Love selling methadone.
←Rate | 01-13-2012 14:46 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead.
←Rate | 11-10-2012 22:40 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon We only stalk the ones we love.
←Rate | 08-22-2012 08:38 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon Now..a cheaper way to express your love...----E-cards !
←Rate | 07-22-2012 23:40 Comments (0)  



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