Cj Funny Status Messages



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Page: 7 of 9

   messageicon So here's the deal... If I wanna hear about god or religion I'll go to church... So, if I delete you... You know why, Just a heads up....
←Rate | 12-22-2011 12:39 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate the smell of Walmart when I walk in. It smells like old beer and subway. Merry Christmas everyone!
←Rate | 12-24-2011 16:55 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon You people that are all cleaned up with the tree out of the house need to stop showing off. The rest of us are drowning in cardboard boxes and pine needles.
←Rate | 12-26-2011 22:47 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just because I liked your status, doesn't mean I actually read it. More to make you feel like someone actually cares about what you have to say.
←Rate | 12-28-2011 20:23 by Cj Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Yellow Pages delivery guy, Could you please just deliver those to my recycle bin......it'll save me a step.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 12:43 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Toy Story must have been written by a woman. Who else would name their toys Woody and Buzz!!
←Rate | 01-06-2012 20:20 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Rhinos are really just old, fat unicorns. Don't argue. you know i'm right.
←Rate | 01-14-2012 10:22 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon I lost a friend overnight, It was very sudden. There must be a reason, but I can't for the life of me think what it might be. Now they're gone. Yesterday I had 583 friends, now only 582 I hope everyone reads this far before they say "sorry for your loss"
←Rate | 01-26-2012 11:03 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want to learn the Vietnamese language so I can sit here and understand the ladies doing pedicures. Between their tone and their giggles, I know they're talking Sh*t!!
←Rate | 01-27-2012 20:13 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Condoms Prevent Minivans!!
←Rate | 01-31-2012 00:18 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon The apple only falls where you leave it !
←Rate | 01-31-2012 21:41 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Your face isn't a coloring book. Chill on the makeup!!
←Rate | 02-19-2012 12:37 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon You never realize what you have until it's gone...toilet paper is a prime example!
←Rate | 03-01-2012 10:47 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can't judge a book by it's cover...but you can judge milk by it's smell.
←Rate | 03-15-2012 11:54 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate it when you look in a car window to fix ur hair.. after standing there for 5 minutes... you see someone in the car...
←Rate | 03-23-2012 22:13 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why is it that melted cheese tastes like a zillion times better than regular cheese?
←Rate | 03-23-2012 22:43 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate when crumbs fall down your cleavage.....sometimes I think my boobs eat more than I do
←Rate | 04-11-2012 17:44 by Cj Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should get out of any relationship where you secretly hope the other person is kidnapped and held for a ransom you can't pay.
←Rate | 04-12-2012 17:55 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon My karma punch card is going to be full after today:)
←Rate | 04-24-2012 19:09 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Based on my wardrobe, dog hair is my favorite color:)
←Rate | 04-28-2012 01:09 by CJ Comments (0)  




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