bego Funny Status Messages
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I was playing with my new toaster in the bathtub today then I read the warning label and it said not to. I was shocked.
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04-23-2012 21:22 by BEGO
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What do Justin Bieber and Pinocchio have in common? They both want to be real boys.
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11-15-2013 22:28 by BEGO
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People who dream big sleep a lot.
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06-24-2011 22:52 by BEGO
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If you peel back the foil on pudding and don’t lick the pudding on the foil before indulging in the pudding then I’m sorry to say you’re not cool.
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01-25-2013 21:11 by BEGO
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Baby on board* Oh really? Thanks for letting me know, I was about to ram into your car, but now I won't.
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07-24-2012 22:24 by BEGO
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Last night my neighbors kept me up with the headboard banging. I finally yelled "The guy last night made her scream louder" That shut em up
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02-13-2012 22:38 by BEGO
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Hacking is like sex. You get in, you get out, and hope that you didn't leave something that can be traced back to you
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12-16-2011 21:44 by BEGO
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For the love of God, ASK me, don't AXE me!
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06-26-2012 22:45 by BEGO
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Stop warning stupid people and give evolution a chance to work its wonderful process.
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04-25-2012 21:13 by BEGO
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Four things that can never be recovered: the stone after it’s thrown, the word after it’s spoken, the occasion after it’s missed, and the time after it’s gone.
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04-05-2013 20:54 by BEGO
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Follow your heart, but bring your brain for back-up.
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05-21-2012 22:05 by BEGO
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Sending a risky text & thinking.. “Oh god, they hate me,” if they don't respond within 30 seconds.
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01-25-2012 16:01 by BEGO
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DO NOT TEXT ME WHILE YOU’RE DRIVING I’m not trying to be the last unfinished message they find when your as% is wrapped around a tree.
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06-21-2013 21:34 by BEGO
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Education should be free for all people willing to learn!
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08-30-2013 23:13 by BEGO
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Facebook should change ” It's complicated ” to ” It's confusing & stressful. “
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03-23-2011 12:10 by BEGO
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I am a nurse, I'm just not registered.
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03-13-2012 21:05 by BEGO
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The Bible teaches you to love - and the Kamasutra explains how
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06-06-2011 22:07 by BEGO
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Walmart calls them "self-checkouts," I call them "I might not pay for some of this."
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06-25-2012 22:02 by BEGO
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Setting up a Facebook account for your unborn child should be considered child abuse.
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04-28-2013 21:42 by BEGO
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Nothing makes me happier at work than walking into the bathroom and all the stalls are empty.
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12-13-2012 21:42 by BEGO
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