Tried a Walmart pizza for the first time tonight and after biting into it I thought I accidentally cooked it with the cardboard they package them in, but it was just the pizza.
Nighttime is not for sleeping. It is for eating all the chocolate chips out of trail mix while thinking of every possible outcome for a situation you can't control.
Me to barking dog: You get away from that window. Leave the poor bunny rabbit alone. Also me: I bought you a bunny squeak toy you can pretend to kill over and over.
Whelp, I'm not even out the door yet and I could already tell it's going to be another one of those days I'm not going to change the world and make it a better place for all mankind to live with my Facebook post.