Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny status message updates for FaceBook or Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to fall after leaning your chair back a little too far.
←Rate | 09-16-2009 13:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.
←Rate | 09-16-2009 13:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die
←Rate | 09-16-2009 13:18 by randizzle Comments (0)  


   messageicon and from that day forward, where ever I went I was running.
←Rate | 09-16-2009 06:45 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Traffic is moving pretty fast today, so I've decided to stop in the center lane open the hood and bring things back to normal. YOU'RE WELCOME!!!!
←Rate | 09-16-2009 06:18 by Psymon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey Prince of discord, Find your own Crap.!! that was old joke.
←Rate | 09-16-2009 03:08 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon a new idea for Anyone that likes breakfast in Bed, Sleep in the kitchen..!!
←Rate | 09-16-2009 03:04 by Prince Of Discord | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks Kayne West truly is a gay fish.
←Rate | 09-16-2009 01:01 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon also known as H1N1
←Rate | 09-16-2009 00:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon " Anyone like breakfast in Bed?? Sleep in the kitchen..!! "
←Rate | 09-15-2009 20:40 by May | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon facebook
←Rate | 09-15-2009 20:20 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon aparently there is a difference between funny and clever and I dont know the difference-so I am told.
←Rate | 09-15-2009 19:23 by Piney | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon says ladies...don't be looking for the white knights on horses... keep your eye out for the vampire in the volvo!!!
←Rate | 09-15-2009 19:11 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon wishes the Kool-Aid guy would bust through my wall.
←Rate | 09-15-2009 19:11 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon getting a little tired of her husband writing "for marijuana" in the memo line of our cheques...
←Rate | 09-15-2009 19:09 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon found Waldo. Other than the shirt, what was all the fuss about.
←Rate | 09-15-2009 19:08 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon just said "no" to Kanye and Serena's FB friend requests.
←Rate | 09-15-2009 18:59 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon got a new gig as John & Kate's divorce counsellor. It's going well except she's a screaming lunatic and he's a 32 year old imbecile in Ed Hardy t-shirts. We're working on it...
←Rate | 09-15-2009 18:58 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who's the Worst??..Chris Brown, Kanye West, Michael Vick...One punches a girl in the eye...One Makes a young girl cry....One makes a Dog fight to Die.
←Rate | 09-15-2009 15:54 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon ended her relationship with Kanye West...
←Rate | 09-15-2009 15:21 by abster Comments (0)  


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