Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Submit a Status Message
Funny Status Messages
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Search Messages:
«Prev
«1
5790
5791
5792
5793
5794
5795
5796
5797
6371
Next»
Page: 5794 of 6371
Lingerie is just expensive wrapping paper.
17
10
←Rate |
07-07-2010 18:41 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
"You look like you work out", said no one, to me.
41
11
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:53 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
headed out for a quiet beer. Followed by ten noisy ones...
27
5
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:52 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
it's impossible to fool-proof anything because fools are so ingenious.
5
6
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:52 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
there are more important things in life than money. The trouble is, they all cost money.
73
13
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:51 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
a bartender is just an under-qualified pharmacist.
11
7
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:50 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
A procrastinator's work is never done.
19
5
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:44 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
I wonder what the word for dots looks like in braille
7
13
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:38
Comments (
0
)
I like fruit baskets because it gives you the ability to mail someone a piece of fruit without appearing insane. Like, if someone just mailed you an apple you'd be like ‘Huh? What the hell is this?', but if it's in a fruit basket you're like ‘
17
8
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:35
Comments (
0
)
thinks the digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly
12
6
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:33
Comments (
0
)
You may be out of my sight... but never out of my mind... I Miss You!
9
17
←Rate |
07-07-2010 17:04 by
Ohio
Comments (
0
)
took your survey, sent you a round, tended your garden, poked you, hugged you, and sent you 10 useless gifts. It's hard being a Facebook friend.
7
17
←Rate |
07-07-2010 16:54
Comments (
0
)
tired. Tried to fall back asleep this mornig, but couldnt, woke up with such a stiffy, I had no skin left to close my eyes!
11
25
←Rate |
07-07-2010 16:46
Comments (
1
)
I've lost most of my hearing, but it's okay because it turns out the only thing people say to me is "nothing, nevermind."
8
17
←Rate |
07-07-2010 16:44 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
The cost of a stamp is going up 2 cents. I'll e-mail all my friends and let them know.
21
8
←Rate |
07-07-2010 16:25 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
attn: hackers...computer viruses are so 2001...let's come up with something new
7
14
←Rate |
07-07-2010 16:16
Comments (
0
)
There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.
18
8
←Rate |
07-07-2010 15:56 by
CJ
Comments (
0
)
His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.
7
10
←Rate |
07-07-2010 15:55 by
PeeWee
Comments (
0
)
First, God created idiots. That was just for practice. Then He created school boards.
11
8
←Rate |
07-07-2010 15:48 by
PeeWee
Comments (
0
)
Eight more days and I can start telling the truth again.
9
6
←Rate |
07-07-2010 15:47
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
5790
5791
5792
5793
5794
5795
5796
5797
6371
Next»
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com