Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Facebook Status Messages or Whatsapp updates and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon People are like slinkys Useless Stupid But Fun to Push down Stsirs
←Rate | 02-03-2010 01:04 by Luka Comments (0)  

   messageicon A bisexual Is someone that likes Girls as much as the next Guy
←Rate | 02-03-2010 01:02 by Luka Comments (0)  

   messageicon Our Parents Spend half Our Lives Trying to get us to Stand up and talk now they 0nly want to see you sit down and shut up
←Rate | 02-03-2010 00:56 by Luka Comments (0)  

   messageicon Bear Grylls. His name is what he eats... and how he cooks it.
←Rate | 02-03-2010 00:25 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Lord loves a workin' man; don't trust whitey; see a doctor and get rid of it.
←Rate | 02-03-2010 00:15 Comments (0)  

   messageicon out making some changes in hisher life...leave a message and I'll get back yo you. if I don't return your message your one of the changes!
←Rate | 02-03-2010 00:10 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Should've Driven to New York in my Toyota to see Puxotony Phil
←Rate | 02-02-2010 23:57 Comments (1)  

   messageicon out making some changes in hisher life...leave a message and I'll get back yo you. if I don't return your message your one of the changes!
←Rate | 02-02-2010 23:47 by Comments (0)  

   messageicon good girls go to heaven , Bad girls go everywhere!
←Rate | 02-02-2010 23:22 by khaleed Comments (0)  

   messageicon I am cornhoolio, I make peepee from my bunghole
←Rate | 02-02-2010 22:53 by Xtravagent Comments (0)  

   messageicon bubblewrap under his bedsheets, so during the "Heat of Passion" it sounds like FIREWORKS going off!
←Rate | 02-02-2010 22:51 by Tommy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Most folks are carbon copies of their indoctrination, education, organized religion and politically correct propaganda. Some of us "Independent Thinkers" walk our own unique path of discovery, simultaneously emanating a vibration to source and truth.
←Rate | 02-02-2010 22:18 by potts Comments (0)  

   messageicon your just pissed because its NOT ILLEGAL TO BE WHITE...YET
←Rate | 02-02-2010 22:13 Comments (0)  

   messageicon What do you call an Ethiopian with a feather up his ass? A dart.
←Rate | 02-02-2010 22:05 Comments (0)  

   messageicon What do you get when you cross a retard with a gang banger? Someone who spray paints on a chain link fence.
←Rate | 02-02-2010 21:51 Comments (0)  

   messageicon As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two...
←Rate | 02-02-2010 21:43 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut save you 30 cents?
←Rate | 02-02-2010 21:39 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Every morning, I get up and look through the 'Forbes' list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work
←Rate | 02-02-2010 21:38 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house
←Rate | 02-02-2010 21:37 Comments (0)  

   messageicon In a recent survey into blow jobs, and why men like them so much 6% liked the feeling, 12% liked the excitement and 82% just like the peace and quiet.
←Rate | 02-02-2010 21:36 by Pineapple Comments (0)  

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