Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 56 of 6387
Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.
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07-30-2022 01:58
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Welp…??? really? Okay got it, you enjoy a good spanking.
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04-19-2022 19:31
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Welp, James Welp
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04-19-2022 20:13
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My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.
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08-03-2022 01:22
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Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
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08-15-2022 15:04
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U don git da bug if you already da illest, knowahimsayin
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06-24-2022 00:55
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Travel and tell no one. Live a true love story and tell no one. Live happily and tell no one. People ruin beautiful things.
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05-05-2022 03:19
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I love you, but I’ve chosen Rock & Roll.
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05-09-2022 02:29
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Cougar Area: Please stay on trails, travel in small groups and do not allow men under 30 to travel alone.
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01-13-2023 04:22
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I have a PHD, P – pretty, H – huge, D
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04-20-2022 12:29
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An alcoholic is someone you don’t like who drinks as much as you do.
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07-27-2022 01:00
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Hey Gurl, if your phone number turned into money, how much would you have?
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04-20-2022 12:28
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Had a welp once, saw a doctor and got rid of it.
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04-19-2022 20:11
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My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.
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08-03-2022 01:22
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Martian: “Take us to your leader.” Me: No! You wouldn’t believe it.
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06-09-2022 01:45
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Her: I have ovaries. Him: Is that why you ovary act?
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05-01-2022 22:00 by Lucas
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Gas prices keep getting higher, but it still tastes the same.
We used to laugh at Grandpa when he'd head off and go fishing. But we wouldn't be laughing that evening when he'd come back with some whore he picked up in town.
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07-25-2022 10:44
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T.G.I.A. ~ Thank goodness I’m awesome!
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01-12-2023 03:27
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A smile is a facelift that’s in everyone’s price range.
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07-27-2022 01:02
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