Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   My x-Girlfriend's cell phone got more attention than I did. I asked her, how long does it have to vibrate before you get off !

   Trump is right! He has accomplished so much! Getting Mexico to pay for your wall, approving TrumpCare, and repealing ObamaCare! Congrats!

   How about you take a knee and protest the next time you get stopped by the police rather than running or fighting

   Honestly, it's not the way I look that reveals my age. It's my use of complete sentences, proper grammar and spelling when I text.

   Did the kid who was voted most likely to succeed back in high school...succeeded yet?

   A year ago, Facebook was great according to orange. Now it's anti-Trump. Make up your mind orange head.

   Trump's lack of empathy about Puerto Rico is staggering.

   Draft dodgers always have the most to say about patriotism in an attempt to clear their guilty conscience.

   Tweet others the same way you want them to tweet you.

   Hillary got rich by selling her power...Donald got rich by earning it!

   NFL is seeing that disrespecting the flag is really bad for business...it's causing division & no unity! The left is NEVER morally correct!

   I'm more excited than a long line of f@t ladies in the grocery store express lane that have their arms filled with Halo Top Diet Ice Cream on a buy one get one free special.

   Question, can Donald Trump be charged with negligent homicide for his failure to do all possible to assist the citizens of Puerto Rico?

   How can Trump have the nerve to take credit for inheriting the strong economy from Barack Obama. He haven't enacted his own budget.

   NFL= NOT FOR LONG

   NASCAR, you will do as your told just like you were trained.

   Got some good financial news today. The kid I've been sponsoring in some third-world country got eaten by a lion.

   I took a knee today. My shoe was untied. It wasn't a statement. Just wanted to let everyone to know.

   Hugh Hefner dead at 91.... =( Good thing he had so many reasons to keep it up for so long

   So....:it's not okay to have children deported, but it is okay to have them aborted? How does that make sense?!