Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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Page: 54 of 6389

   messageicon A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished.
←Rate | 08-08-2022 03:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We now have reason to believe Biden ripped the tag off his mattress in 1987.
←Rate | 05-19-2022 07:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When she grabs your booty and whispers, “thick a$$-niggggaa imma get you pregnant.”
←Rate | 07-03-2022 11:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I say I’ll be there in a few minutes, stop calling me every hour.
←Rate | 04-11-2022 20:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pro Tip: If you drink enough beer, your Tinder date starts to look like their profile picture.
←Rate | 01-13-2023 04:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Biden: No more gas stoves!
←Rate | 01-18-2023 03:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're in a restaurant waiting for the waiter, aren't you the waiter?
←Rate | 05-08-2022 07:41 by Zenith-Nadir Comments (0)  


   messageicon Clicked on a strange message and now it burns when I pee.
←Rate | 04-11-2022 20:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Stop killing mountains to make Mountain Dew!
←Rate | 04-22-2022 00:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Million Dollar Idea: Dinosaur Chicken Nuggets that may cause drowsiness.
←Rate | 03-13-2022 05:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You’re not bipolar, you’re just two stupid bi!ches in one.
←Rate | 05-09-2022 02:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Let me get this straight, we can send 40 billion to eastern Europe, but Elon Musk buying Twitter for 40 billion could have solved world hunger?
←Rate | 05-17-2022 06:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Corn Pop beat Joe Biden with a chain, c’mon man.
←Rate | 05-19-2022 07:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The first symptom of Covid-19 is believing everything the media says.
←Rate | 07-01-2022 01:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you click “accept cookies” but then you don’t get any cookies.
←Rate | 04-30-2022 15:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why did the man fall down the well? Because he couldn’t see that well.
←Rate | 04-24-2022 23:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you’re in love it’s the most glorious two and a half days of your life.
←Rate | 08-03-2022 01:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I see chocolate, I hear two voices in my head. One says, “eat the chocolate.” The other says, “you heard me right, eat it.”
←Rate | 01-13-2023 04:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Back in 5 minutes ~ if not, read this again.
←Rate | 01-12-2023 03:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Papa Bear: Read the part again where she burns her whore mouth on my porridge.
←Rate | 05-01-2022 20:03 by Billy Comments (0)  




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